I'm not sure why I did it. Maybe because the Olympics are on? Maybe because I just finished Scott Jurek's book and wanted to see how far I could push myself? Maybe just because I'm sick and tired of feeling like a bit of a failure?
Whatever the reason, this morning I did something amazing. I really want to add qualifiers to that sentence, like "something amazing for me" or "you know, unless you're a real athlete." But that shit is silly. This morning, I hit it out of the fucking park.
My goal pace for the marathon is 12 min/mile. So I had been running all of my runs at that pace. In large part, I was doing this because I thought it was all I could do. I kept thinking that I had to take it easy because I'm fat and out of shape and lazy and there's no way I can go faster, at least not before the marathon.
And maybe (probably) come race day, my pace will be 12 min/mile. But today I rocked that. Every mile I ran was under 12:00.
Mile 1 - 11:08
Mile 2 - 11:26
Mile 3 - 11:05
Mile 4 - 10:32
HOLY SHIT. I have not been that fast in a long time. Like, a really long time. I think 1L was the last time I could run that fast or faster.
I did it because I started this run assuming I could. Still, I tried to stop myself. I said I would just jog the first half of a mile. When I turned the corner at my half-mile point, I kept jogging. I kind of thought at that point that I would do the whole thing, but I was still trying to rein it in. I said I'd just do the first mile. Then I hit the turn-around at one mile in and I was still jogging. That's when I knew that I was going to jog the whole four miles.
It wasn't exciting at the time, it was simply how it was going to go. It was utterly calm. It was only when I finished that I was pumping my fist in the air and raising my Powerade in a little salute to myself.
I'm kind of glad nobody was here to see me finish, because I cried a little bit. It just felt so good to know I could do that. I couldn't help it.
To be perfectly honest, this is the best thing that has happened to me in months. I'm still kind of crying a bit.
So to my brain, the great doubter, the mocking asshole telling me I can't, and to a lifetime of self-hatred and frustration, I would like to say, "Go fuck yourself." It's the little moments like this when I can finally ball up all the negative shit I carry around and flip it off.
It's awesome. But for now, farewell! I'll write again soon.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
In Forma Pauperis
Before becoming unemployed, I laughed when people told jokes about the waste and stupidity in government. Tee hee, how funny that we're ruled by the monkeys who were smart enough to escape the zoo! Working in the State's Attorney's Office, though, I was really only involved with government employees who were hard-working and, for the most part, pretty damn intelligent.
Then I became unemployed, and the government jokes became a much more morbid kind of humor.
When you're unemployed, you have to get a bunch of information to the Illinois Department of Employment Security. The main way to do this is by applying online. That's where the problems start. The application tries to be helpful, with little question mark links next to all the words that might be confusing. There are a lot of question marks. However, clicking these links does not take you to a definition, or even an FAQ page. It just opens a new tab that goes right back to the IDES website homepage. If I had hope left for government, I would say this was intentional, and you are supposed to use the little search box at the top of the page to find the definition yourself. But the search feature isn't very good, and I don't think even the government is stupid enough to think that all people are smart enough to do that.
Then, after you apply online, if there are any questions about your application, they have to get in touch with you. They do not do this through email. They do this by sending a letter to your house. One letter for every issue that comes up in your application. So if you have three issues, or contests (which I did), then you will get three letters. Only it's not just one letter saying, "Hey, we need to talk to you about something." They also send you a separate letter that contains a survey. This survey tells you to fill it out and send it in to IDES, where it will help them figure out your issue. Only that's a lie, because the survey is just a repeat of information you've already given IDES in the online application. I'm serious. It's a printout of the questions you answered online. No fucking joke.
Not only is the paper survey redundant, it's moot. It's useless. Because if you have an issue with IDES, they will send you YET ANOTHER LETTER letting you know that they will call you at a particular time. That's right. Don't call them, they'll call you. And if you send them those surveys, all nice and filled out, they don't give a shit about them because they're already scheduled to call you and talk to you in person. So you didn't have to take the time to fill out those surveys and send them in. Even if you did, it doesn't actually make any difference or help you in any way whatsoever because they do not look at them. The lovely caller lady I talked to in my first call said she didn't even know I had returned the surveys. And for fun, just to add insult to injury, the letters do not come with return envelopes. That's right, you have to supply both the return envelope and the return postage. Seriously? Wow.
Thank you, IDES, for killing an entire forest for no good god damn reason. You fucking wastes of oxygen and humanity.
And now, you've reached the point where the fun STARTS. Let's look at the academic employment issue. Because I worked for Kaplan (test prep company) for about one month, they refused to give me benefits until they had verified that I was not a teacher requesting unemployment during the summer break. I filled out my survey and sent it in (I didn't know any better at the time), then completed a phone call, and then got a letter saying that the issue was cleared.
So I had gone through the process and fixed the problem.
Then I got the same letter again.
This time, I did not fill out the survey. I waited for them to call me. To be fair, I was already kind of mad when they called, so I picked up the phone and identified both myself and where the call was coming from and told them I was prepared for my interview. This left the person who called me speechless for a few minutes. I guess when you expect stupidity and get angry intelligence, it kind of throws you. She repeated what I had already told her, about the call being scheduled to clear up the academic contest. I then told her that the call had been misscheduled, as the issue was already cleared and the call was not necessary.
She then told me I was wrong.
That is not a good idea. It is really not a good idea. That is a Bad Thing, and you should not do it. It is so far from being a Good Thing, or a Correct Thing, or even a Helpful Thing, that I doubt this particular idea even knows what a Good Thing, Correct Thing, or Helpful Thing is.
. . .
DO NOT TELL ME I AM WRONG YOU WORTHLESS LITTLE EXCUSE FOR A HUMAN BEING, BECAUSE I AM CORRECT AND I AM ALREADY PISSED OFF AND THIS IS NOT HELPING. V E R Y B A D I D E A.
Etc.
. . .
Of course, I hit mute on my phone and screamed all of my obscenities while she was double checking my information in her computer. It took long enough that I was almost out of my favorite choice combinations of four letter words by the time she came back. Then she told me that the call was not necessary, that it had been misscheduled, and she apologized for wasting my time.
I hung up. I punched the wall. My hand hurts, but it made me feel a bit better.
But hey, look at the bright side! Thanks to the supreme idiocy of the IDES, you lovely folks get to suffer through two journal entries in one day! How delightful!
But for now, I'm going to peace out and try to find something intelligent to make me feel better.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Then I became unemployed, and the government jokes became a much more morbid kind of humor.
When you're unemployed, you have to get a bunch of information to the Illinois Department of Employment Security. The main way to do this is by applying online. That's where the problems start. The application tries to be helpful, with little question mark links next to all the words that might be confusing. There are a lot of question marks. However, clicking these links does not take you to a definition, or even an FAQ page. It just opens a new tab that goes right back to the IDES website homepage. If I had hope left for government, I would say this was intentional, and you are supposed to use the little search box at the top of the page to find the definition yourself. But the search feature isn't very good, and I don't think even the government is stupid enough to think that all people are smart enough to do that.
Then, after you apply online, if there are any questions about your application, they have to get in touch with you. They do not do this through email. They do this by sending a letter to your house. One letter for every issue that comes up in your application. So if you have three issues, or contests (which I did), then you will get three letters. Only it's not just one letter saying, "Hey, we need to talk to you about something." They also send you a separate letter that contains a survey. This survey tells you to fill it out and send it in to IDES, where it will help them figure out your issue. Only that's a lie, because the survey is just a repeat of information you've already given IDES in the online application. I'm serious. It's a printout of the questions you answered online. No fucking joke.
Not only is the paper survey redundant, it's moot. It's useless. Because if you have an issue with IDES, they will send you YET ANOTHER LETTER letting you know that they will call you at a particular time. That's right. Don't call them, they'll call you. And if you send them those surveys, all nice and filled out, they don't give a shit about them because they're already scheduled to call you and talk to you in person. So you didn't have to take the time to fill out those surveys and send them in. Even if you did, it doesn't actually make any difference or help you in any way whatsoever because they do not look at them. The lovely caller lady I talked to in my first call said she didn't even know I had returned the surveys. And for fun, just to add insult to injury, the letters do not come with return envelopes. That's right, you have to supply both the return envelope and the return postage. Seriously? Wow.
Thank you, IDES, for killing an entire forest for no good god damn reason. You fucking wastes of oxygen and humanity.
And now, you've reached the point where the fun STARTS. Let's look at the academic employment issue. Because I worked for Kaplan (test prep company) for about one month, they refused to give me benefits until they had verified that I was not a teacher requesting unemployment during the summer break. I filled out my survey and sent it in (I didn't know any better at the time), then completed a phone call, and then got a letter saying that the issue was cleared.
So I had gone through the process and fixed the problem.
Then I got the same letter again.
This time, I did not fill out the survey. I waited for them to call me. To be fair, I was already kind of mad when they called, so I picked up the phone and identified both myself and where the call was coming from and told them I was prepared for my interview. This left the person who called me speechless for a few minutes. I guess when you expect stupidity and get angry intelligence, it kind of throws you. She repeated what I had already told her, about the call being scheduled to clear up the academic contest. I then told her that the call had been misscheduled, as the issue was already cleared and the call was not necessary.
She then told me I was wrong.
That is not a good idea. It is really not a good idea. That is a Bad Thing, and you should not do it. It is so far from being a Good Thing, or a Correct Thing, or even a Helpful Thing, that I doubt this particular idea even knows what a Good Thing, Correct Thing, or Helpful Thing is.
. . .
DO NOT TELL ME I AM WRONG YOU WORTHLESS LITTLE EXCUSE FOR A HUMAN BEING, BECAUSE I AM CORRECT AND I AM ALREADY PISSED OFF AND THIS IS NOT HELPING. V E R Y B A D I D E A.
Etc.
. . .
Of course, I hit mute on my phone and screamed all of my obscenities while she was double checking my information in her computer. It took long enough that I was almost out of my favorite choice combinations of four letter words by the time she came back. Then she told me that the call was not necessary, that it had been misscheduled, and she apologized for wasting my time.
I hung up. I punched the wall. My hand hurts, but it made me feel a bit better.
But hey, look at the bright side! Thanks to the supreme idiocy of the IDES, you lovely folks get to suffer through two journal entries in one day! How delightful!
But for now, I'm going to peace out and try to find something intelligent to make me feel better.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
The Flip
Today, I reached a very cool point in my marathon training. It's what I call the flip, and I think people often don't notice when it happens. Or, if they notice, they don't make near as big a deal out of it as I do.
When I started marathon training, my longest run was 6 miles. That was the big kahuna for the week. Today, my midweek run is 6 miles. My long run has officially become just another number in midweek mileage.
THAT. IS. AWESOME.
Congratulations, me! You've taken a number that was once a feat (for me, at least) of endurance and determination and grown so far past it, that it is now just another blip of the midweek grind. Seriously, that's cool.
And this point is what I call The Flip. It's when you reach a change not only in your mileage, but in your perspective. My long run this past weekend was 15 miles. I ran 2 miles on my own, then ran a half marathon. At the end of it all I thought, "On race day, I'll only have 11 more miles to go!" I mean, yeah, technically it's 11.1. Which is a fun number in and of itself. But still, when I can run 15 miles and then be okay at the thought of someday soon tacking another 11 miles onto that, it is the point where enough things are burnt away and enough other things are rebuilt in your brain that this is a normal thought.
That is also awesome, in that broken down and rebuilt way that always seems creepy from the outside. Anytime you meet someone who is really dedicated to something, in the way that people are supposed to love their spouses and their children, it will always seem weird to you. Unless you are also initiated in the magic and delight of the particular obsession. It happens with everything from running to anime to the Oxford English Dictionary.
I'm proud to say that I have been immersed in some of the various festivals, conventions, and celebrations that mark high points in various obsessive worlds, and I can say without hesitation that I have enjoyed them all. It's amazing to walk around and know that every person you see, almost without exception, has a 97% chance of being totally ecstatic just because they are where they are. Look at photos from ACen, or Comic-Con, or the expo at any major distance event. These people are delighted because they made it. They're there. It's either happening or guaranteed to happen so soon you can taste it.
For real, that is magic.
And I tend to think of that, and remember the times I have experienced it, when I see a flip in my training, or even in a particular race. Any time I notice that my thinking has been rearranged to work better, or keep me more motivated, for a particular type of work or activity, it makes me grin. Even if it happens at the 4.5 mile mark on a 6 mile run, when I feel like falling over because I have definitely not hydrated enough.
But, whatever. Forget my achy legs and my dripping sweat. It's the flip.
That's all for now, friends. Take care!
Meowfully yours,
Marley
When I started marathon training, my longest run was 6 miles. That was the big kahuna for the week. Today, my midweek run is 6 miles. My long run has officially become just another number in midweek mileage.
THAT. IS. AWESOME.
Congratulations, me! You've taken a number that was once a feat (for me, at least) of endurance and determination and grown so far past it, that it is now just another blip of the midweek grind. Seriously, that's cool.
And this point is what I call The Flip. It's when you reach a change not only in your mileage, but in your perspective. My long run this past weekend was 15 miles. I ran 2 miles on my own, then ran a half marathon. At the end of it all I thought, "On race day, I'll only have 11 more miles to go!" I mean, yeah, technically it's 11.1. Which is a fun number in and of itself. But still, when I can run 15 miles and then be okay at the thought of someday soon tacking another 11 miles onto that, it is the point where enough things are burnt away and enough other things are rebuilt in your brain that this is a normal thought.
That is also awesome, in that broken down and rebuilt way that always seems creepy from the outside. Anytime you meet someone who is really dedicated to something, in the way that people are supposed to love their spouses and their children, it will always seem weird to you. Unless you are also initiated in the magic and delight of the particular obsession. It happens with everything from running to anime to the Oxford English Dictionary.
I'm proud to say that I have been immersed in some of the various festivals, conventions, and celebrations that mark high points in various obsessive worlds, and I can say without hesitation that I have enjoyed them all. It's amazing to walk around and know that every person you see, almost without exception, has a 97% chance of being totally ecstatic just because they are where they are. Look at photos from ACen, or Comic-Con, or the expo at any major distance event. These people are delighted because they made it. They're there. It's either happening or guaranteed to happen so soon you can taste it.
For real, that is magic.
And I tend to think of that, and remember the times I have experienced it, when I see a flip in my training, or even in a particular race. Any time I notice that my thinking has been rearranged to work better, or keep me more motivated, for a particular type of work or activity, it makes me grin. Even if it happens at the 4.5 mile mark on a 6 mile run, when I feel like falling over because I have definitely not hydrated enough.
But, whatever. Forget my achy legs and my dripping sweat. It's the flip.
That's all for now, friends. Take care!
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Friday, June 29, 2012
Interesting Developments
I suppose that's a polite way of putting it. As my first interruption in consistency, I should apologize to all (five?) of you who read these posts for my recent absence.
To explain that break in posting, I will let you know that I recently lost my job. Something like this has never happened to me before, and although it was done very nicely, I believe I'm still trying to really wrap my head around it. I get up at the same time, I run when it's a run day, and then I have a blank slate. That sounds delightful, but it's actually just draining. Without the structure of work and obligation, I have been finding it difficult to know what to do with myself. So I spend an unsettlingly large amount of time just wandering, both literally and mentally. It is weird and bizarre and has not been sitting well with me.
I have still been running, though. I find that I enjoy my run days even more, because I know that for at least the first few hours that I'm awake, I know what I will be doing. I hit snooze once or twice and then roll out of bed. I put on whatever running clothes are on top in the drawer. I double check my schedule to make sure I have my mileage right, and then I set out. While I'm running, I don't think about much except my 4/1 walk/run pattern, my breathing, and trying to keep my core tight. When I'm done, I down some Powerade zero, and then cook breakfast. Breakfast on run days is scrambled eggs with veggies and two slices of buttered toast, plus as much water as I can get myself to drink. Then I sync all my gadgets, make a few notes on the running sites to remember what I learned from my run, and it's off to the showers to clean up.
But once I'm dressed and clean, it's like I fall off track. I lose direction entirely. The first few days after it happened were different. I was reacting to it, trying to get a bunch of immediately necessary ducks in a row, and I had something of a purpose. And now that the initial emergency is over, that is what I lack. I lack purpose. I try to go to the library every day, but I often just do it for the walk and to get out of the house. I watch movies. Sometimes I knit, or contemplate starting a sewing project. But everything feels piecemeal, like I'm throwing a life together from whatever bits and scraps blow past in the wind. My brain is constantly flying all over the place, leaping from one stray thought to the next and it's hard to keep up. I've taken to napping during the really hot parts of the afternoon, but I think that's affecting my sleep schedule in the evenings and I don't like it.
In sum, I feel lost. It's also been difficult not to be super hard on myself and feel more or less worthless because of what happened. Enough people have told me that would be an incorrect reaction that I can assume they are correct. But it doesn't stop me from feeling like that fairly regularly. And without a real structure in which to place myself, without some sort of external goal to work towards, I feel there's not much to keep me from sinking into that far more often than I would like.
I've never been much good at internal motivation. I rely upon external goals and rewards to both motivate and value myself. That is a terrible way to be, but somehow that's how I turned out.
So, after dumping all that on you, I don't really have anything to follow it up with. I am trying to put together a plan, a schedule, but that feels kind of ridiculous to me. So instead I'm launching job applications at a crazy rate, and trying to put together some kind of list of amusements that I can go to in order to keep myself from going insane.
And through all this, my running continues. I have to do 10 this weekend, which I think should go well. I'm just modifying my 8 mile route from last weekend a bit to get it done, so that should work nicely. If I head out as early as I think I will (5:00am), then I should beat the really bad heat that will come later. It will still be mid to upper 70s while I'm out there, but that's manageable, especially with the amount of water I drag with me on runs. I do need to stock up on my preferred running fuel (Gu Chomps) before tomorrow, but that shouldn't be a problem.
If you can find a moment, wish me luck. With everything. I have a feeling I'm going to need it before too long.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
To explain that break in posting, I will let you know that I recently lost my job. Something like this has never happened to me before, and although it was done very nicely, I believe I'm still trying to really wrap my head around it. I get up at the same time, I run when it's a run day, and then I have a blank slate. That sounds delightful, but it's actually just draining. Without the structure of work and obligation, I have been finding it difficult to know what to do with myself. So I spend an unsettlingly large amount of time just wandering, both literally and mentally. It is weird and bizarre and has not been sitting well with me.
I have still been running, though. I find that I enjoy my run days even more, because I know that for at least the first few hours that I'm awake, I know what I will be doing. I hit snooze once or twice and then roll out of bed. I put on whatever running clothes are on top in the drawer. I double check my schedule to make sure I have my mileage right, and then I set out. While I'm running, I don't think about much except my 4/1 walk/run pattern, my breathing, and trying to keep my core tight. When I'm done, I down some Powerade zero, and then cook breakfast. Breakfast on run days is scrambled eggs with veggies and two slices of buttered toast, plus as much water as I can get myself to drink. Then I sync all my gadgets, make a few notes on the running sites to remember what I learned from my run, and it's off to the showers to clean up.
But once I'm dressed and clean, it's like I fall off track. I lose direction entirely. The first few days after it happened were different. I was reacting to it, trying to get a bunch of immediately necessary ducks in a row, and I had something of a purpose. And now that the initial emergency is over, that is what I lack. I lack purpose. I try to go to the library every day, but I often just do it for the walk and to get out of the house. I watch movies. Sometimes I knit, or contemplate starting a sewing project. But everything feels piecemeal, like I'm throwing a life together from whatever bits and scraps blow past in the wind. My brain is constantly flying all over the place, leaping from one stray thought to the next and it's hard to keep up. I've taken to napping during the really hot parts of the afternoon, but I think that's affecting my sleep schedule in the evenings and I don't like it.
In sum, I feel lost. It's also been difficult not to be super hard on myself and feel more or less worthless because of what happened. Enough people have told me that would be an incorrect reaction that I can assume they are correct. But it doesn't stop me from feeling like that fairly regularly. And without a real structure in which to place myself, without some sort of external goal to work towards, I feel there's not much to keep me from sinking into that far more often than I would like.
I've never been much good at internal motivation. I rely upon external goals and rewards to both motivate and value myself. That is a terrible way to be, but somehow that's how I turned out.
So, after dumping all that on you, I don't really have anything to follow it up with. I am trying to put together a plan, a schedule, but that feels kind of ridiculous to me. So instead I'm launching job applications at a crazy rate, and trying to put together some kind of list of amusements that I can go to in order to keep myself from going insane.
And through all this, my running continues. I have to do 10 this weekend, which I think should go well. I'm just modifying my 8 mile route from last weekend a bit to get it done, so that should work nicely. If I head out as early as I think I will (5:00am), then I should beat the really bad heat that will come later. It will still be mid to upper 70s while I'm out there, but that's manageable, especially with the amount of water I drag with me on runs. I do need to stock up on my preferred running fuel (Gu Chomps) before tomorrow, but that shouldn't be a problem.
If you can find a moment, wish me luck. With everything. I have a feeling I'm going to need it before too long.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Learning By Doing
Consistency is helpful because there is so much to learn from it.
My plan to run the Chicago Marathon is a run/walk plan. I plan to walk at a fast pace for 4 minutes and then run as close to full-out as I can for 1 minute. So far, this is keeping me at about a 12 min/mile pace. But, there's a lot more to consider. My long run yesterday, and I was also trying to figure out my schedule for hydrating and eating. I took a sip of water after every run break, and at the end of every mile I ate one GU Chomp.
The Chomps are like gels, only they're the consistency of gummy bears. I can't stand the gels, so I go with their alternatives. They are awesome, and the plan worked like a charm. My energy level kept up through the entire run, and I felt good afterwards. Consistency helps during a run because it means that you always have sufficient water and fuel to keep you going.
Plus, it means you get into a habit. You don't have to think so much about running and you can focus on the sights around you. Like the woman I saw running yesterday, like actually going at a jog, in neon green gladiator sandals. It kind of threw me off, because I thought at first that she was running barefoot, but no she had itty bitty little thong sandals on. It was bizarre!
Although, after my run on Saturday I have a bone to pick with the USA Track and Field Association. I like to know my route before I go out. I want to know where I'm going and approximately where my mile markers are. So I tend to go to their mapping site and plan out routes before I leave in the mornings on my long runs.
The past two weekends, I have plotted out 6 mile routes. Both times, I have gone the entire route and found that I was at least a mile and a half short of where I should have been. It ticked me off, because when I got to what I thought was the end of my run, I then had to keep going. If you've ever run to a finish line, only to be told you have to keep going, you can understand my frustration.
So, I'm a bit disappointed with that particular service. I figured I would put it out here in case I'm not the only one availing myself of their mapping site.
For now, though, off to the office! There's work to do, and I have to spend this post-run energy on something!
Until next time.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
My plan to run the Chicago Marathon is a run/walk plan. I plan to walk at a fast pace for 4 minutes and then run as close to full-out as I can for 1 minute. So far, this is keeping me at about a 12 min/mile pace. But, there's a lot more to consider. My long run yesterday, and I was also trying to figure out my schedule for hydrating and eating. I took a sip of water after every run break, and at the end of every mile I ate one GU Chomp.
The Chomps are like gels, only they're the consistency of gummy bears. I can't stand the gels, so I go with their alternatives. They are awesome, and the plan worked like a charm. My energy level kept up through the entire run, and I felt good afterwards. Consistency helps during a run because it means that you always have sufficient water and fuel to keep you going.
Plus, it means you get into a habit. You don't have to think so much about running and you can focus on the sights around you. Like the woman I saw running yesterday, like actually going at a jog, in neon green gladiator sandals. It kind of threw me off, because I thought at first that she was running barefoot, but no she had itty bitty little thong sandals on. It was bizarre!
Although, after my run on Saturday I have a bone to pick with the USA Track and Field Association. I like to know my route before I go out. I want to know where I'm going and approximately where my mile markers are. So I tend to go to their mapping site and plan out routes before I leave in the mornings on my long runs.
The past two weekends, I have plotted out 6 mile routes. Both times, I have gone the entire route and found that I was at least a mile and a half short of where I should have been. It ticked me off, because when I got to what I thought was the end of my run, I then had to keep going. If you've ever run to a finish line, only to be told you have to keep going, you can understand my frustration.
So, I'm a bit disappointed with that particular service. I figured I would put it out here in case I'm not the only one availing myself of their mapping site.
For now, though, off to the office! There's work to do, and I have to spend this post-run energy on something!
Until next time.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Thursday, June 14, 2012
On My Addiction to Technology
It's true. I am a gadget gal. I love iPods, GPS watches, smart phones, and computers that are faster than blazes (an inept analogy, given how inconsistently fires travel). When I run, I have an iPod clipped to my waist, a heart rate monitor wrapped around my chest, and a GPS watch on my wrist. When I get home, I download my runs onto my computer and plug them in to three different websites. The iPod data goes to Nikeplus.com, the GPS data goes to Garmin Connect, and then I sync the Garmin data with Dailymile.com.
This is all insane, and writing it down makes it even more overwhelming how much I have let technology influence my runs. But I can't stop. I crave data. What was my fastest pace? My slowest? How did my average heart rate from today's run compare to my run this time last week? Last month? Am I getting faster? Am I consistent? It all feeds my need to know, and it's information that I would not have but for all the tech I carry with me on every run.
Heck, today I even thought about adding my cell phone to the mix. I had downloaded an app called CharityMile, which uses sponsorships to donate money to charity for every mile you run, walk, or bike. As I was unlocking the door to step outside, with an extra running pouch strapped around my waist, I realized that I had finally hit the breaking point. The running pouch I would have to use to carry my phone is a thing that I hate. I used to wear it with my original style iPod before I got my iPod Nano (yes, I own more than one iPod and no, I don't think that's weird because they serve entirely different purposes). It would bounce up and down as I ran, and the feeling of it smacking the top of my ass withe very damn step nearly drove me insane. But it was better, I thought, than running in silence. And then I got my Nano and all of my problems were solved.
I vowed that day that I would stop wearing it, and I have done pretty well with that. I haven't worn it since. And unless I'm on a long run, I don't need my phone because I'm not straying too far from home, so there was no reason to even think about bringing it with me. Yet here I was, trying to add one more gadget so I could have less than $1.00 donated to charity for my run. Does every cent help in this economy? Yes. And I was going to break my anti-pouch vow to bring them the change they would get from my run.
Except, at the last moment, I decided I did not need another piece of data. I did not need another gadget on me as I ran. I took my phone out of the pouch and put it back in my purse. Then I took off that stupid pouch and dropped it in front of Johnny Ringo, my big black and white cat. I figured he would bat it around until I couldn't find the damn thing anymore, and then when I moved it would simply be a sad piece of detritus that I could leave behind me.
So, with my heart rate monitor, GPS watch, and iPod Nano, I started my morning run. The sad part? Leaving the phone behind allowed me to feel at least a little bit low-tech. Which just goes to show you how well runners can delude themselves when they need to.
Speaking of all this tech, though, if you are a runner, bicyclist, or workout enthusiast of any kind, please feel free to friend me on DailyMile. My name there is Marley Cats. As it always is.
But for now, I'm off to clean the dust off my feet and head to bed. I recently joined a kickball league, and despite our losing streak I'm enjoying the heck out of it. But it does make your feet terrifically dusty.
Until next time!
Meowfully yours,
Marley
This is all insane, and writing it down makes it even more overwhelming how much I have let technology influence my runs. But I can't stop. I crave data. What was my fastest pace? My slowest? How did my average heart rate from today's run compare to my run this time last week? Last month? Am I getting faster? Am I consistent? It all feeds my need to know, and it's information that I would not have but for all the tech I carry with me on every run.
Heck, today I even thought about adding my cell phone to the mix. I had downloaded an app called CharityMile, which uses sponsorships to donate money to charity for every mile you run, walk, or bike. As I was unlocking the door to step outside, with an extra running pouch strapped around my waist, I realized that I had finally hit the breaking point. The running pouch I would have to use to carry my phone is a thing that I hate. I used to wear it with my original style iPod before I got my iPod Nano (yes, I own more than one iPod and no, I don't think that's weird because they serve entirely different purposes). It would bounce up and down as I ran, and the feeling of it smacking the top of my ass withe very damn step nearly drove me insane. But it was better, I thought, than running in silence. And then I got my Nano and all of my problems were solved.
I vowed that day that I would stop wearing it, and I have done pretty well with that. I haven't worn it since. And unless I'm on a long run, I don't need my phone because I'm not straying too far from home, so there was no reason to even think about bringing it with me. Yet here I was, trying to add one more gadget so I could have less than $1.00 donated to charity for my run. Does every cent help in this economy? Yes. And I was going to break my anti-pouch vow to bring them the change they would get from my run.
Except, at the last moment, I decided I did not need another piece of data. I did not need another gadget on me as I ran. I took my phone out of the pouch and put it back in my purse. Then I took off that stupid pouch and dropped it in front of Johnny Ringo, my big black and white cat. I figured he would bat it around until I couldn't find the damn thing anymore, and then when I moved it would simply be a sad piece of detritus that I could leave behind me.
So, with my heart rate monitor, GPS watch, and iPod Nano, I started my morning run. The sad part? Leaving the phone behind allowed me to feel at least a little bit low-tech. Which just goes to show you how well runners can delude themselves when they need to.
Speaking of all this tech, though, if you are a runner, bicyclist, or workout enthusiast of any kind, please feel free to friend me on DailyMile. My name there is Marley Cats. As it always is.
But for now, I'm off to clean the dust off my feet and head to bed. I recently joined a kickball league, and despite our losing streak I'm enjoying the heck out of it. But it does make your feet terrifically dusty.
Until next time!
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Sunday, June 10, 2012
And Introducing...
... Me!!
I believe that blogs are supposed to start with an introduction of the author. So, in another example of how awkwardly this blog is starting out, I will begin my second post with a brief introduction.
My name is Marley. I am an Assistant State's Attorney. I started this blog as a way to keep my self motivated as I train for the Chicago Marathon. What I did not mention in my last post is that I have actually registered for the Chicago Marathon three times. The first time was in 2007, the year it was 88 degrees with humidity hovering at or above 90%. It was awful, and I have never before and never since been as sick as I was after they stopped me from running. I didn't even get to finish the marathon. I ran about 18 miles, which was shorter than my longest training run, and I was REALLY angry about it. I continued to be angry even while I was vomiting and barely able to walk once I got home. Like I said, it was bad.
The second time I registered, I wasn't consistent and my training fell apart. I could say that I was in the middle of law school and everything else just got in the way, but this is life. Everything else always gets in the way. What you have to do is make damn sure that the things you love bust through everything else and get done. I did not do that the second time I registered for Chicago. So I decided to volunteer and I showed up race day (earlier than the runners, mind you) and set up a water station and handed out cups of water to thirsty runners.
This year is my third registration and I'm hoping that whole "third times the charm" thing comes through for me. That would really be helpful.
Today I ran 3 miles. Yesterday I ran 6 miles. I finished the 6 miles in 1:12:28. That's only 28 seconds slower than I was hoping for! If I do 12 minute miles, I would have come in at or slightly before 1:12:00. But, to my credit, I had to stop only half a mile into the run to take a little pebble out of my shoe. It would have driven me mad had I left it in there, and it took me at least 30 seconds to get the damn thing out of my shoe. So, I think that's a good start. Today was also a solid run, completing my 3 miles in 35:29. So I'm definitely being consistent about my pacing.
My goal for Chicago is to run the marathon in 5 hours and 30 minutes. To be fair, that's kind of hella slow. Nobody who can actually run for an entire marathon would ever finish that slow. But I am a slow runner. I usually finish towards the back of the pack, with what I like to call The Stragglers Brigade. We're a rag-tag assortment of folks, comprised of everything from your 70 year old power walkers to the 20-somethings who went out way too fast and are now struggling to walk to the finish. I fall somewhere in the middle, since I'm not good at running year-round and usually have to start training from scratch once it's warm enough to go outside without a protective heated habitat.
But this year, I have a plan. I am going to follow that plan, and it will lead me to glory. Or as much glory as I can take from a 5:30:00 marathon finish.
That's all for today, folks. I hope you don't mind these ramblings, because I find them too amusing to stop.
Take care, and we'll see you next time.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
I believe that blogs are supposed to start with an introduction of the author. So, in another example of how awkwardly this blog is starting out, I will begin my second post with a brief introduction.
My name is Marley. I am an Assistant State's Attorney. I started this blog as a way to keep my self motivated as I train for the Chicago Marathon. What I did not mention in my last post is that I have actually registered for the Chicago Marathon three times. The first time was in 2007, the year it was 88 degrees with humidity hovering at or above 90%. It was awful, and I have never before and never since been as sick as I was after they stopped me from running. I didn't even get to finish the marathon. I ran about 18 miles, which was shorter than my longest training run, and I was REALLY angry about it. I continued to be angry even while I was vomiting and barely able to walk once I got home. Like I said, it was bad.
The second time I registered, I wasn't consistent and my training fell apart. I could say that I was in the middle of law school and everything else just got in the way, but this is life. Everything else always gets in the way. What you have to do is make damn sure that the things you love bust through everything else and get done. I did not do that the second time I registered for Chicago. So I decided to volunteer and I showed up race day (earlier than the runners, mind you) and set up a water station and handed out cups of water to thirsty runners.
This year is my third registration and I'm hoping that whole "third times the charm" thing comes through for me. That would really be helpful.
Today I ran 3 miles. Yesterday I ran 6 miles. I finished the 6 miles in 1:12:28. That's only 28 seconds slower than I was hoping for! If I do 12 minute miles, I would have come in at or slightly before 1:12:00. But, to my credit, I had to stop only half a mile into the run to take a little pebble out of my shoe. It would have driven me mad had I left it in there, and it took me at least 30 seconds to get the damn thing out of my shoe. So, I think that's a good start. Today was also a solid run, completing my 3 miles in 35:29. So I'm definitely being consistent about my pacing.
My goal for Chicago is to run the marathon in 5 hours and 30 minutes. To be fair, that's kind of hella slow. Nobody who can actually run for an entire marathon would ever finish that slow. But I am a slow runner. I usually finish towards the back of the pack, with what I like to call The Stragglers Brigade. We're a rag-tag assortment of folks, comprised of everything from your 70 year old power walkers to the 20-somethings who went out way too fast and are now struggling to walk to the finish. I fall somewhere in the middle, since I'm not good at running year-round and usually have to start training from scratch once it's warm enough to go outside without a protective heated habitat.
But this year, I have a plan. I am going to follow that plan, and it will lead me to glory. Or as much glory as I can take from a 5:30:00 marathon finish.
That's all for today, folks. I hope you don't mind these ramblings, because I find them too amusing to stop.
Take care, and we'll see you next time.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Not Day One
Part of the reason I'm keeping this blog is accountability. The key to successful running is consistency. And a good pair of shoes, but I already have those. Consistency is what makes your training work. Consistency is what will get you across the finish line feeling only a little bit like death. And how do you stay consistent? You tell everybody in the world what you're doing so that the threat of shame at telling them you haven't done your run for today, or that you don't think you're going to be trained enough to run the marathon, keeps you going and keeps you consistent.
Use your friends like cattle prods to keep you moving. Some people might look at this same scenario and say that they are using their friends as encouragement. Like promising yourself that you'll buy a new running outfit after one month of not missing a run. Hell with that, I'll just go out and buy the damn outfit now. I'm not good at delayed gratification. But the threat of failure? The threat of having everyone know you failed? That will get my ass out of bed and on the road running any day of the week. Unless it's snowing. I don't run in snow.
Either way, by reading this blog you are implicitly agreeing to allow me to use you as a type of negative reinforcement to keep me running and make my training work. It's a beautiful relationship, and I hope it works out for us all.
This isn't day one of my training plan. I don't think it's technically day one of this blog, either, since I created the darn thing about a month ago and just never posted until now. Yesterday was National Running day, which was neither the day of my first blog post nor a running day. Interesting.
Today I ran 3.01 miles in 34 min 30 sec. That is both slow and fast. It's slow compared to most people who run marathons. It's fast for me, because it means I'm running my miles in less than 12 minutes apiece. It's a mixed bag, but I'll take it.
My goal for this year is to run the Chicago Marathon. Well, first I'm going to get married. The Marathon is the weekend after. Because it seems like a good idea to get married one weekend and then run a marathon the next.
Use your friends like cattle prods to keep you moving. Some people might look at this same scenario and say that they are using their friends as encouragement. Like promising yourself that you'll buy a new running outfit after one month of not missing a run. Hell with that, I'll just go out and buy the damn outfit now. I'm not good at delayed gratification. But the threat of failure? The threat of having everyone know you failed? That will get my ass out of bed and on the road running any day of the week. Unless it's snowing. I don't run in snow.
Either way, by reading this blog you are implicitly agreeing to allow me to use you as a type of negative reinforcement to keep me running and make my training work. It's a beautiful relationship, and I hope it works out for us all.
This isn't day one of my training plan. I don't think it's technically day one of this blog, either, since I created the darn thing about a month ago and just never posted until now. Yesterday was National Running day, which was neither the day of my first blog post nor a running day. Interesting.
Today I ran 3.01 miles in 34 min 30 sec. That is both slow and fast. It's slow compared to most people who run marathons. It's fast for me, because it means I'm running my miles in less than 12 minutes apiece. It's a mixed bag, but I'll take it.
My goal for this year is to run the Chicago Marathon. Well, first I'm going to get married. The Marathon is the weekend after. Because it seems like a good idea to get married one weekend and then run a marathon the next.
I don't do things on a small scale. I started running so I could run marathons. Hopefully, Chicago will be another notch on my belt and the first in a consistent series of marathons, maybe one or two a year from now on. That would be pretty awesome.
Then again, I first need to get a handle on that consistency thing.
Here goes...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)