I suppose that's a polite way of putting it. As my first interruption in consistency, I should apologize to all (five?) of you who read these posts for my recent absence.
To explain that break in posting, I will let you know that I recently lost my job. Something like this has never happened to me before, and although it was done very nicely, I believe I'm still trying to really wrap my head around it. I get up at the same time, I run when it's a run day, and then I have a blank slate. That sounds delightful, but it's actually just draining. Without the structure of work and obligation, I have been finding it difficult to know what to do with myself. So I spend an unsettlingly large amount of time just wandering, both literally and mentally. It is weird and bizarre and has not been sitting well with me.
I have still been running, though. I find that I enjoy my run days even more, because I know that for at least the first few hours that I'm awake, I know what I will be doing. I hit snooze once or twice and then roll out of bed. I put on whatever running clothes are on top in the drawer. I double check my schedule to make sure I have my mileage right, and then I set out. While I'm running, I don't think about much except my 4/1 walk/run pattern, my breathing, and trying to keep my core tight. When I'm done, I down some Powerade zero, and then cook breakfast. Breakfast on run days is scrambled eggs with veggies and two slices of buttered toast, plus as much water as I can get myself to drink. Then I sync all my gadgets, make a few notes on the running sites to remember what I learned from my run, and it's off to the showers to clean up.
But once I'm dressed and clean, it's like I fall off track. I lose direction entirely. The first few days after it happened were different. I was reacting to it, trying to get a bunch of immediately necessary ducks in a row, and I had something of a purpose. And now that the initial emergency is over, that is what I lack. I lack purpose. I try to go to the library every day, but I often just do it for the walk and to get out of the house. I watch movies. Sometimes I knit, or contemplate starting a sewing project. But everything feels piecemeal, like I'm throwing a life together from whatever bits and scraps blow past in the wind. My brain is constantly flying all over the place, leaping from one stray thought to the next and it's hard to keep up. I've taken to napping during the really hot parts of the afternoon, but I think that's affecting my sleep schedule in the evenings and I don't like it.
In sum, I feel lost. It's also been difficult not to be super hard on myself and feel more or less worthless because of what happened. Enough people have told me that would be an incorrect reaction that I can assume they are correct. But it doesn't stop me from feeling like that fairly regularly. And without a real structure in which to place myself, without some sort of external goal to work towards, I feel there's not much to keep me from sinking into that far more often than I would like.
I've never been much good at internal motivation. I rely upon external goals and rewards to both motivate and value myself. That is a terrible way to be, but somehow that's how I turned out.
So, after dumping all that on you, I don't really have anything to follow it up with. I am trying to put together a plan, a schedule, but that feels kind of ridiculous to me. So instead I'm launching job applications at a crazy rate, and trying to put together some kind of list of amusements that I can go to in order to keep myself from going insane.
And through all this, my running continues. I have to do 10 this weekend, which I think should go well. I'm just modifying my 8 mile route from last weekend a bit to get it done, so that should work nicely. If I head out as early as I think I will (5:00am), then I should beat the really bad heat that will come later. It will still be mid to upper 70s while I'm out there, but that's manageable, especially with the amount of water I drag with me on runs. I do need to stock up on my preferred running fuel (Gu Chomps) before tomorrow, but that shouldn't be a problem.
If you can find a moment, wish me luck. With everything. I have a feeling I'm going to need it before too long.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Friday, June 29, 2012
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Learning By Doing
Consistency is helpful because there is so much to learn from it.
My plan to run the Chicago Marathon is a run/walk plan. I plan to walk at a fast pace for 4 minutes and then run as close to full-out as I can for 1 minute. So far, this is keeping me at about a 12 min/mile pace. But, there's a lot more to consider. My long run yesterday, and I was also trying to figure out my schedule for hydrating and eating. I took a sip of water after every run break, and at the end of every mile I ate one GU Chomp.
The Chomps are like gels, only they're the consistency of gummy bears. I can't stand the gels, so I go with their alternatives. They are awesome, and the plan worked like a charm. My energy level kept up through the entire run, and I felt good afterwards. Consistency helps during a run because it means that you always have sufficient water and fuel to keep you going.
Plus, it means you get into a habit. You don't have to think so much about running and you can focus on the sights around you. Like the woman I saw running yesterday, like actually going at a jog, in neon green gladiator sandals. It kind of threw me off, because I thought at first that she was running barefoot, but no she had itty bitty little thong sandals on. It was bizarre!
Although, after my run on Saturday I have a bone to pick with the USA Track and Field Association. I like to know my route before I go out. I want to know where I'm going and approximately where my mile markers are. So I tend to go to their mapping site and plan out routes before I leave in the mornings on my long runs.
The past two weekends, I have plotted out 6 mile routes. Both times, I have gone the entire route and found that I was at least a mile and a half short of where I should have been. It ticked me off, because when I got to what I thought was the end of my run, I then had to keep going. If you've ever run to a finish line, only to be told you have to keep going, you can understand my frustration.
So, I'm a bit disappointed with that particular service. I figured I would put it out here in case I'm not the only one availing myself of their mapping site.
For now, though, off to the office! There's work to do, and I have to spend this post-run energy on something!
Until next time.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
My plan to run the Chicago Marathon is a run/walk plan. I plan to walk at a fast pace for 4 minutes and then run as close to full-out as I can for 1 minute. So far, this is keeping me at about a 12 min/mile pace. But, there's a lot more to consider. My long run yesterday, and I was also trying to figure out my schedule for hydrating and eating. I took a sip of water after every run break, and at the end of every mile I ate one GU Chomp.
The Chomps are like gels, only they're the consistency of gummy bears. I can't stand the gels, so I go with their alternatives. They are awesome, and the plan worked like a charm. My energy level kept up through the entire run, and I felt good afterwards. Consistency helps during a run because it means that you always have sufficient water and fuel to keep you going.
Plus, it means you get into a habit. You don't have to think so much about running and you can focus on the sights around you. Like the woman I saw running yesterday, like actually going at a jog, in neon green gladiator sandals. It kind of threw me off, because I thought at first that she was running barefoot, but no she had itty bitty little thong sandals on. It was bizarre!
Although, after my run on Saturday I have a bone to pick with the USA Track and Field Association. I like to know my route before I go out. I want to know where I'm going and approximately where my mile markers are. So I tend to go to their mapping site and plan out routes before I leave in the mornings on my long runs.
The past two weekends, I have plotted out 6 mile routes. Both times, I have gone the entire route and found that I was at least a mile and a half short of where I should have been. It ticked me off, because when I got to what I thought was the end of my run, I then had to keep going. If you've ever run to a finish line, only to be told you have to keep going, you can understand my frustration.
So, I'm a bit disappointed with that particular service. I figured I would put it out here in case I'm not the only one availing myself of their mapping site.
For now, though, off to the office! There's work to do, and I have to spend this post-run energy on something!
Until next time.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Thursday, June 14, 2012
On My Addiction to Technology
It's true. I am a gadget gal. I love iPods, GPS watches, smart phones, and computers that are faster than blazes (an inept analogy, given how inconsistently fires travel). When I run, I have an iPod clipped to my waist, a heart rate monitor wrapped around my chest, and a GPS watch on my wrist. When I get home, I download my runs onto my computer and plug them in to three different websites. The iPod data goes to Nikeplus.com, the GPS data goes to Garmin Connect, and then I sync the Garmin data with Dailymile.com.
This is all insane, and writing it down makes it even more overwhelming how much I have let technology influence my runs. But I can't stop. I crave data. What was my fastest pace? My slowest? How did my average heart rate from today's run compare to my run this time last week? Last month? Am I getting faster? Am I consistent? It all feeds my need to know, and it's information that I would not have but for all the tech I carry with me on every run.
Heck, today I even thought about adding my cell phone to the mix. I had downloaded an app called CharityMile, which uses sponsorships to donate money to charity for every mile you run, walk, or bike. As I was unlocking the door to step outside, with an extra running pouch strapped around my waist, I realized that I had finally hit the breaking point. The running pouch I would have to use to carry my phone is a thing that I hate. I used to wear it with my original style iPod before I got my iPod Nano (yes, I own more than one iPod and no, I don't think that's weird because they serve entirely different purposes). It would bounce up and down as I ran, and the feeling of it smacking the top of my ass withe very damn step nearly drove me insane. But it was better, I thought, than running in silence. And then I got my Nano and all of my problems were solved.
I vowed that day that I would stop wearing it, and I have done pretty well with that. I haven't worn it since. And unless I'm on a long run, I don't need my phone because I'm not straying too far from home, so there was no reason to even think about bringing it with me. Yet here I was, trying to add one more gadget so I could have less than $1.00 donated to charity for my run. Does every cent help in this economy? Yes. And I was going to break my anti-pouch vow to bring them the change they would get from my run.
Except, at the last moment, I decided I did not need another piece of data. I did not need another gadget on me as I ran. I took my phone out of the pouch and put it back in my purse. Then I took off that stupid pouch and dropped it in front of Johnny Ringo, my big black and white cat. I figured he would bat it around until I couldn't find the damn thing anymore, and then when I moved it would simply be a sad piece of detritus that I could leave behind me.
So, with my heart rate monitor, GPS watch, and iPod Nano, I started my morning run. The sad part? Leaving the phone behind allowed me to feel at least a little bit low-tech. Which just goes to show you how well runners can delude themselves when they need to.
Speaking of all this tech, though, if you are a runner, bicyclist, or workout enthusiast of any kind, please feel free to friend me on DailyMile. My name there is Marley Cats. As it always is.
But for now, I'm off to clean the dust off my feet and head to bed. I recently joined a kickball league, and despite our losing streak I'm enjoying the heck out of it. But it does make your feet terrifically dusty.
Until next time!
Meowfully yours,
Marley
This is all insane, and writing it down makes it even more overwhelming how much I have let technology influence my runs. But I can't stop. I crave data. What was my fastest pace? My slowest? How did my average heart rate from today's run compare to my run this time last week? Last month? Am I getting faster? Am I consistent? It all feeds my need to know, and it's information that I would not have but for all the tech I carry with me on every run.
Heck, today I even thought about adding my cell phone to the mix. I had downloaded an app called CharityMile, which uses sponsorships to donate money to charity for every mile you run, walk, or bike. As I was unlocking the door to step outside, with an extra running pouch strapped around my waist, I realized that I had finally hit the breaking point. The running pouch I would have to use to carry my phone is a thing that I hate. I used to wear it with my original style iPod before I got my iPod Nano (yes, I own more than one iPod and no, I don't think that's weird because they serve entirely different purposes). It would bounce up and down as I ran, and the feeling of it smacking the top of my ass withe very damn step nearly drove me insane. But it was better, I thought, than running in silence. And then I got my Nano and all of my problems were solved.
I vowed that day that I would stop wearing it, and I have done pretty well with that. I haven't worn it since. And unless I'm on a long run, I don't need my phone because I'm not straying too far from home, so there was no reason to even think about bringing it with me. Yet here I was, trying to add one more gadget so I could have less than $1.00 donated to charity for my run. Does every cent help in this economy? Yes. And I was going to break my anti-pouch vow to bring them the change they would get from my run.
Except, at the last moment, I decided I did not need another piece of data. I did not need another gadget on me as I ran. I took my phone out of the pouch and put it back in my purse. Then I took off that stupid pouch and dropped it in front of Johnny Ringo, my big black and white cat. I figured he would bat it around until I couldn't find the damn thing anymore, and then when I moved it would simply be a sad piece of detritus that I could leave behind me.
So, with my heart rate monitor, GPS watch, and iPod Nano, I started my morning run. The sad part? Leaving the phone behind allowed me to feel at least a little bit low-tech. Which just goes to show you how well runners can delude themselves when they need to.
Speaking of all this tech, though, if you are a runner, bicyclist, or workout enthusiast of any kind, please feel free to friend me on DailyMile. My name there is Marley Cats. As it always is.
But for now, I'm off to clean the dust off my feet and head to bed. I recently joined a kickball league, and despite our losing streak I'm enjoying the heck out of it. But it does make your feet terrifically dusty.
Until next time!
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Sunday, June 10, 2012
And Introducing...
... Me!!
I believe that blogs are supposed to start with an introduction of the author. So, in another example of how awkwardly this blog is starting out, I will begin my second post with a brief introduction.
My name is Marley. I am an Assistant State's Attorney. I started this blog as a way to keep my self motivated as I train for the Chicago Marathon. What I did not mention in my last post is that I have actually registered for the Chicago Marathon three times. The first time was in 2007, the year it was 88 degrees with humidity hovering at or above 90%. It was awful, and I have never before and never since been as sick as I was after they stopped me from running. I didn't even get to finish the marathon. I ran about 18 miles, which was shorter than my longest training run, and I was REALLY angry about it. I continued to be angry even while I was vomiting and barely able to walk once I got home. Like I said, it was bad.
The second time I registered, I wasn't consistent and my training fell apart. I could say that I was in the middle of law school and everything else just got in the way, but this is life. Everything else always gets in the way. What you have to do is make damn sure that the things you love bust through everything else and get done. I did not do that the second time I registered for Chicago. So I decided to volunteer and I showed up race day (earlier than the runners, mind you) and set up a water station and handed out cups of water to thirsty runners.
This year is my third registration and I'm hoping that whole "third times the charm" thing comes through for me. That would really be helpful.
Today I ran 3 miles. Yesterday I ran 6 miles. I finished the 6 miles in 1:12:28. That's only 28 seconds slower than I was hoping for! If I do 12 minute miles, I would have come in at or slightly before 1:12:00. But, to my credit, I had to stop only half a mile into the run to take a little pebble out of my shoe. It would have driven me mad had I left it in there, and it took me at least 30 seconds to get the damn thing out of my shoe. So, I think that's a good start. Today was also a solid run, completing my 3 miles in 35:29. So I'm definitely being consistent about my pacing.
My goal for Chicago is to run the marathon in 5 hours and 30 minutes. To be fair, that's kind of hella slow. Nobody who can actually run for an entire marathon would ever finish that slow. But I am a slow runner. I usually finish towards the back of the pack, with what I like to call The Stragglers Brigade. We're a rag-tag assortment of folks, comprised of everything from your 70 year old power walkers to the 20-somethings who went out way too fast and are now struggling to walk to the finish. I fall somewhere in the middle, since I'm not good at running year-round and usually have to start training from scratch once it's warm enough to go outside without a protective heated habitat.
But this year, I have a plan. I am going to follow that plan, and it will lead me to glory. Or as much glory as I can take from a 5:30:00 marathon finish.
That's all for today, folks. I hope you don't mind these ramblings, because I find them too amusing to stop.
Take care, and we'll see you next time.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
I believe that blogs are supposed to start with an introduction of the author. So, in another example of how awkwardly this blog is starting out, I will begin my second post with a brief introduction.
My name is Marley. I am an Assistant State's Attorney. I started this blog as a way to keep my self motivated as I train for the Chicago Marathon. What I did not mention in my last post is that I have actually registered for the Chicago Marathon three times. The first time was in 2007, the year it was 88 degrees with humidity hovering at or above 90%. It was awful, and I have never before and never since been as sick as I was after they stopped me from running. I didn't even get to finish the marathon. I ran about 18 miles, which was shorter than my longest training run, and I was REALLY angry about it. I continued to be angry even while I was vomiting and barely able to walk once I got home. Like I said, it was bad.
The second time I registered, I wasn't consistent and my training fell apart. I could say that I was in the middle of law school and everything else just got in the way, but this is life. Everything else always gets in the way. What you have to do is make damn sure that the things you love bust through everything else and get done. I did not do that the second time I registered for Chicago. So I decided to volunteer and I showed up race day (earlier than the runners, mind you) and set up a water station and handed out cups of water to thirsty runners.
This year is my third registration and I'm hoping that whole "third times the charm" thing comes through for me. That would really be helpful.
Today I ran 3 miles. Yesterday I ran 6 miles. I finished the 6 miles in 1:12:28. That's only 28 seconds slower than I was hoping for! If I do 12 minute miles, I would have come in at or slightly before 1:12:00. But, to my credit, I had to stop only half a mile into the run to take a little pebble out of my shoe. It would have driven me mad had I left it in there, and it took me at least 30 seconds to get the damn thing out of my shoe. So, I think that's a good start. Today was also a solid run, completing my 3 miles in 35:29. So I'm definitely being consistent about my pacing.
My goal for Chicago is to run the marathon in 5 hours and 30 minutes. To be fair, that's kind of hella slow. Nobody who can actually run for an entire marathon would ever finish that slow. But I am a slow runner. I usually finish towards the back of the pack, with what I like to call The Stragglers Brigade. We're a rag-tag assortment of folks, comprised of everything from your 70 year old power walkers to the 20-somethings who went out way too fast and are now struggling to walk to the finish. I fall somewhere in the middle, since I'm not good at running year-round and usually have to start training from scratch once it's warm enough to go outside without a protective heated habitat.
But this year, I have a plan. I am going to follow that plan, and it will lead me to glory. Or as much glory as I can take from a 5:30:00 marathon finish.
That's all for today, folks. I hope you don't mind these ramblings, because I find them too amusing to stop.
Take care, and we'll see you next time.
Meowfully yours,
Marley
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Not Day One
Part of the reason I'm keeping this blog is accountability. The key to successful running is consistency. And a good pair of shoes, but I already have those. Consistency is what makes your training work. Consistency is what will get you across the finish line feeling only a little bit like death. And how do you stay consistent? You tell everybody in the world what you're doing so that the threat of shame at telling them you haven't done your run for today, or that you don't think you're going to be trained enough to run the marathon, keeps you going and keeps you consistent.
Use your friends like cattle prods to keep you moving. Some people might look at this same scenario and say that they are using their friends as encouragement. Like promising yourself that you'll buy a new running outfit after one month of not missing a run. Hell with that, I'll just go out and buy the damn outfit now. I'm not good at delayed gratification. But the threat of failure? The threat of having everyone know you failed? That will get my ass out of bed and on the road running any day of the week. Unless it's snowing. I don't run in snow.
Either way, by reading this blog you are implicitly agreeing to allow me to use you as a type of negative reinforcement to keep me running and make my training work. It's a beautiful relationship, and I hope it works out for us all.
This isn't day one of my training plan. I don't think it's technically day one of this blog, either, since I created the darn thing about a month ago and just never posted until now. Yesterday was National Running day, which was neither the day of my first blog post nor a running day. Interesting.
Today I ran 3.01 miles in 34 min 30 sec. That is both slow and fast. It's slow compared to most people who run marathons. It's fast for me, because it means I'm running my miles in less than 12 minutes apiece. It's a mixed bag, but I'll take it.
My goal for this year is to run the Chicago Marathon. Well, first I'm going to get married. The Marathon is the weekend after. Because it seems like a good idea to get married one weekend and then run a marathon the next.
Use your friends like cattle prods to keep you moving. Some people might look at this same scenario and say that they are using their friends as encouragement. Like promising yourself that you'll buy a new running outfit after one month of not missing a run. Hell with that, I'll just go out and buy the damn outfit now. I'm not good at delayed gratification. But the threat of failure? The threat of having everyone know you failed? That will get my ass out of bed and on the road running any day of the week. Unless it's snowing. I don't run in snow.
Either way, by reading this blog you are implicitly agreeing to allow me to use you as a type of negative reinforcement to keep me running and make my training work. It's a beautiful relationship, and I hope it works out for us all.
This isn't day one of my training plan. I don't think it's technically day one of this blog, either, since I created the darn thing about a month ago and just never posted until now. Yesterday was National Running day, which was neither the day of my first blog post nor a running day. Interesting.
Today I ran 3.01 miles in 34 min 30 sec. That is both slow and fast. It's slow compared to most people who run marathons. It's fast for me, because it means I'm running my miles in less than 12 minutes apiece. It's a mixed bag, but I'll take it.
My goal for this year is to run the Chicago Marathon. Well, first I'm going to get married. The Marathon is the weekend after. Because it seems like a good idea to get married one weekend and then run a marathon the next.
I don't do things on a small scale. I started running so I could run marathons. Hopefully, Chicago will be another notch on my belt and the first in a consistent series of marathons, maybe one or two a year from now on. That would be pretty awesome.
Then again, I first need to get a handle on that consistency thing.
Here goes...
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